Photo Cred: She Lives Deliberately

I literally don’t have it in me to write this right now. For some reason, I haven’t been in the mood to do any work lately. I’ve been coming into the office every night dragging and wasting precious time while hopping on Instagram every chance I get. However, through these rough times, I have managed to pull myself together and get to work. Even though it’s been tough to maintain my consistency, I’ve decided to show up each and every single time.

Has it always been this way? Nah bruh. At one point in time, I would have thrown in the towel a long time ago. I haven’t always been able to give myself a pep talk and do what I needed to do in order to make things happen so easily. There was one type of limiting belief in particular that held me back.

ALL-OR-NOTHING THINKING

First, let’s discuss what a limiting belief actually is. (Self) limiting beliefs are those negative things that you believe about yourself. These beliefs hold you back because you are placing limitations on what you can be and your abilities. These beliefs aren’t your reality, which makes it possible to get rid of them if you really want to.

Back to all-or-nothing thinking. Let me break it down to you. Everything from your own personal view of yourself to your view of your life experiences, is divided into black or white terms. With this way of thinking, you’re either a success or you’re a failure. You’re either rich or poor. You’re smart or you’re dumb. There’s no in between. No gray areas.

This was very problematic for me. If I wasn’t seeing almost immediate results, I felt like a failure and would just give up. I was either all in or all out. This was in every area of my life–weight loss efforts, entrepreneurship, financially, everything. I was putting these extreme “perfect” demands on myself that were totally unrealistic, which made me to continually feel frustrated, overwhelmed, and pessimistic. I had little motivation to keep going until I was successful.

One day, I realized that this was extremely unhealthy and that if I didn’t make any changes ASAP, then I wouldn’t make any type of progress in my life. I would ultimately end up a miserable old hag if I continued thinking and operating this way.

So how did these changes take place?

I simply started to focus on the positive in every situation. No it didn’t happen overnight; changing old ways of thinking takes a ton of hard work and determination. You’ve literally been thinking this way for years so change will definitely take time to achieve. You have to remove the pressure that you’re putting on yourself and take small baby steps everyday towards whatever it is that you’re trying to accomplish. By taking small steps, you’re going to end up putting forth more of an effort and getting more done. Stop trying to do everything, which almost always ends with you doing nothing instead. Stop defining “failure” by those minor setbacks that are bound to happen. Define your success by showing up and doing the work, regardless of what happens. Every single day.

Here’s a few way’s you can change this mindset.

Start by identifying when you are thinking in an “all or nothing” way.

Being aware of your thoughts and how they impact your actions is the first step in changing.  When you are able to recognize these thoughts, it’s a good idea for you to start tracking them.  You could start a journal so that you’ll be able to have them all down in one place.

Challenge those beliefs.

You have to challenge those belief patterns every time they arise and think of ways that you can make changes.  For example, saying “I’m not able to save much money so I’m not going to save any at all.”  Work on changing this way of thinking by saying “Even though I’m not able to save much money right now, I’ll save what I can.”  Remember every little bit counts.  By thinking this way, you will start to change your actions little by little.  You’ll start by saving a small amount such as $1, and work your way up from there.

Be patient.

You’ve most likely been thinking this way for years so it’s not going to be a cake walk working towards change.  You can’t get frustrated because it’s not happening fast enough for you or because you can’t seem to stop thinking this way.  It’s going to take a while to shift your mindset, so please be patient, kind, and committed to yourself.

Now let’s talk about it. Do you have any self limiting money beliefs? Be honest now and sound off in the comments, I wanna hear from you!

P.S. If you thought that this was insanely awesome or made you think about someone that you know, please share this with them!